A New Harvest, yes with coffee mugs.

Well I officially joined Harvest Christian Fellowship last night, a church in my home town of Lubbock, Texas. I have been attending this church for a little over 7 weeks and have been graciously accepted by all the members I have met.

I came to this church completely broken with a hard heart, a bad attitude, and very guarded mind to the authenticity my friend claimed they possess. They also have a little bit of a reputation in town for being “radical” whatever that really means. And honestly I was looking for any excuse to write off the church body as a whole not just this “radical” church, but the whole church as the body of Christ. So without them knowing I had placed my bar of judgment very very high fully expecting them to fail and awaiting the day I could yell out to God, “SEE I TOLD YOU. NO ONE REALLY CARES.”

I walked in with all my knowledge and my right ways of thinking just waiting for the times I could claim heresy or blasphemy, or even condemn the ways they worshiped, gathered tithe or took communion. I waited and waited like a vulture ready for its pray. But those moments never came and just when I thought they might; truth would fall and hit me like a ton of bricks and I would realize I was the one who had been wrong.

My heart was slowly softened by these sweet kind people and the truth they kept placing at my feet just waiting for me to pick it up and own it. Even down to the day I joined the church my heart was hardened to let them in fully. My plan of demise was failing and I was grasping at straws.

I resorted to criticizing the tiniest of little things (the only ammo I had left.) I was just sure God didn’t want me in this church due to the fact that they give coffee cups to guests on their first Sunday. Where I in my ivory tower felt that money spent on this tiny little gift should go to Missions or the poor or some grand need I deemed worthy. Pfft what a fool I was. Didn't I love my own mug, didn't it make me feel special on my first Sunday to receive a free gift. HELLO! ROBYNN, wake up there are as many different ways to reach people as there are people to reach.

I had planned to attend the Membership class. I was sure this was to be my moment, sure that in their doctrine there would be a big red flag I could seize and wave as I claimed my victory. I would wave that flag and prove to God this was not the place for me. I signed up online weeks ago and placed it in my Outlook calendar, color coded by the way, navy blue, August 8th precisely my day of conquest.

Well as you can guess much to my surprise when I attended Church on August 1st there it was in the bulletin and announced loud and clear by the assistant pastor. Membership Class tonight. WHAT? But I wasn’t prepared; I hadn’t searched the scripture for just the right bible darts I needed to bring down God’s plan. I even had a lengthy discussion that afternoon with my friend, whom had invited me to attend this church, about those evil coffee mugs. I was sure to convince her my ammo was enough. Right? She, in her humbleness, listened to my silly cry of desperation and validated my right to have fears but encouraged me to attend the class anyway.

Oh I was going to go alright, I wasn’t going to miss this. Just you wait, I thought, I’ll go and hate it and I’ll be right! But as I thought that I immediately became sad. Is this what I wanted? I had come to enjoy this church and its coffee mugs. I loved my small group and how they picked me up from the dirt and brushed me off even when I refused to do so myself. I loved that this church was “radical” which apparently in Lubbock gossip lingo means alive. So what if it wasn’t the church that I thought I originally wanted, couldn’t I for once in my life trust that God knew what I needed more than I did?

I walked through the doors that evening nervous that my evil plot would be written all over my face. That I would be picked out from the crown easily as if I had a bright red A sewn onto the front of my clothes. And you know what I think maybe, just maybe my plot was seen. Perhaps my arrogance and hard heart had paved my way and my secret plot was not so secret at all. But you know what? The Pastors were still gentle and caring toward me even despite all the walls and ammo I had placed between us. They spoke the truth about the church and it’s beliefs and weren’t afraid that I would find my sought after flag of victory. They didn’t tell me this is where God wanted me and they didn’t tell me I wrong for testing them so harshly. They simple spoke truth and waited for me to make my own decision.

All in all God was right and always had been, no, Harvest Christian Fellowship is not perfect, but no church is. We are the church and for all our trying we are still Christ’s faithless bride. I am proud of my decision and fully believe this is where God wants me for this season of my life.